My textbook said, it’s okay

Imagine
not just flowers,
but a field of green
growing out,
that’s it-
it’s a gradual,

you can’t rush it,
it doesn’t work that way;

hold the blade
against your skin,
something you’re comfortable with;
choose something,
a matte knife or
a box cutter-

you will need to grasp
something
with a handle,
nothing too light or too heavy.

Run the back of it down
your skin once
or twice,
get to know it by
unzipping the top layers,
opening to new skin-
the pink, that’s what you want-
intimacy.

Now turn the edge over,
touch your skin with it;

deep breaths—cut
into it, one motion,
not too hard
just to see a bit of red;
don’t worry
the hue will intensify.

You’ve create a stencil,
use it-
pick up the blade and run it down
again, and again,
don’t stop,

don’t even look,
just listen to your body,
you will feel the trickle of blood
but that’s not the signal to stop,
not yet,
keep opening it;

Stop
when you feel yourself pull
the blade in,
when your skin becomes willing,
don’t indulge it.
Tease it.

Take a look,
the red on your complexion,
don’t cover it,
your wound is gasping,
feeding-

there will be blossom
soon,
flowers, trees, and rivers;

let it grow
slowly, slowly.